Premise:
What social life would be like if people behaved like dogs.
Opening scene:
A living room. Some of the guests have already arrived and are racing
around the room, variously hugging, colliding, dancing around each other,
patting one another vigorously on the shoulders and jumping up and down.
Another guest arrives at the door and rings the bell. Everyone runs over
to the door, evidently excited beyond belief, and stands or jumps around,
jostling each other while staring at the door and yelling, “WHO’S THERE?!?!
WHO’S THERE!?!?!”
The guest on the other side of the door yells back, “WHO’S THERE?!?!?
WHO’S THERE!?!?”
Somehow, the new arrival enters and the party resumes as before.
The camera follows several of the guests around, including:
A muscular male dressed all in black who carries a Frisbee every-where,
clutched tightly to his chest. If anyone touches the Frisbee, he whirls
abruptly around and stalks off, glaring over his shoulder.
Another man, dressed in plaid, rather jolly, who has a drooling problem.
Every so often he shakes his head and drool flies onto adjacent guests,
who don’t even notice.
A depressed-looking woman who spends the entire evening methodically
ripping a large, stuffed chair to shreds.
A small group huddled together in a corner. They are all talking loudly
and at the same time about completely unrelated subjects.
A huge guy, with jeans jacket and tattoo, who goes up to various people,
drapes his arm over their shoulders and gives them a giant squeeze. Whoever
it is immediately hands their hors d’oeuvre to the guy, who eats it.
A very small old lady with frizzy hair who leaps out from behind the
furniture at passersby and speaks sharply to them. Even the huge guy
is daunted.
The party Lothario
who sidles up
to anyone, male
or female, and
tries to smooch,
but often misses
the other person’s
face. Nobody
seems to mind.
Various bits of action occur:
Someone emerges from the bathroom, and everyone rushes over and crowds
in to see what’s happened.
A guest, looking out the window, suddenly gets very excited and yells, “A
CAT!!! A CAT!!! A CAT!!!” Everyone rushes to the window and joins in,
yelling “A CAT!!! A CAT!!! A CAT!!!”
Two people—one big, one little—grab an appetizer at the same time. They
stand stock still, each holding on to it and staring out the corner of
their eyes at each other. Suddenly, the big one whirls around and tries
to walk off with it. The little person, however, doesn’t let go and is
flung around in the first one’s wake.
In the kitchen,
several guests
have knocked over
the garbage and
are going through
it. In the backyard,
several people
with little spades
are digging holes.
A fight breaks out in the living room between two guests,
but it’s over in three seconds and the opponents hug each other joyfully.
Several guests can be seen hiding bits of food around the living room.
They carefully scan for a likely spot, put the food down, then pick it
up again and start looking for a better place.
One guest, with his hands full of food, simply holds onto it and snarls
at anyone who approaches him. He keeps trying to add more food to his
pile, spilling as much as he acquires.
Dinner is served:
Everyone races over to the table and there’s a big to-do while the seating
arrangement is worked out.
Then all the guests eat as fast as they possibly can. Every so often,
one guest simply grabs something off the plate of the person next to
him/her. Sometimes that person grabs it back.
When everyone’s finished, they jump up and change places to inspect each
other’s plates.
After dinner, everyone takes a nap. They are sprawled around the room,
some in little groups huddled together, some on their backs on couches
with their feet up on the arms and their hands flung over the back, some
curled up awkwardly in overstuffed chairs with their chins propped up
on the arms. Occasionally, we see limbs twitching and hear little contented
noises.
Party games:
Tug of war
How many tennis balls can you hold.
A relay race in the back yard where the baton is never passed off. Each
member of the team simply grabs hold when his or her turn arrives and
everyone runs together.
Tug of war
Singing together around the piano, but everyone sings a different song.
Tag
Grab the tail of the donkey.
Musical chairs, where shoving is allowed and you can sit on more than
one chair. The big guy in the jeans jacket always wins.
Good-byes:
A real dog party, of course, would never stop. So we have to introduce
another group of humans who gradually arrive to pick up the guests.
This is no easy task, as the target guest runs off when called. There’s
a lot of milling around and loud confusion as the caretaker humans
go after the guests, sometimes grabbing them by the collar or the arm
and hauling them away while the guest looks back at the crowd, waving
joyfully.
Outside, on the sidewalk, a passerby is knocked down by a group of departing
guests.
Everyone looks very happy, and the good-byes are loud and enthusiastic.
The End
