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If Dogs Could Read
What topics would capture their attention?

Arizona Daily Sun columnist Tom Carpenter always prompts me to start Sunday mornings with a chuckle, but this week, I laughed especially hard in response to his column “If our pets could read.” It shows great insight into what sorts of issues might be of interest to dogs.

He proposes a number of possible articles for the imaginary (as far as I know anyway!) magazine “People Fancy.” My favorites titles were:

Biting the Hands that Feed Us. Commonsense tips for avoiding this faux pas.

Ten Code Words for “Walk.” Never miss another one.

Obesity. Laps are disappearing at an alarming rate. A roundtable discussion.

Baby on Board. Twenty easy steps you can take to stay in the house and out of the shelter after the baby arrives.

What topics do you imagine your dog would want to read about?

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Karen B. London, PhD, is a Bark columnist and a Certified Applied Animal Behaviorist specializing in the evaluation and treatment of serious behavior problems in the domestic dog.

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Submitted by Marie Muscolino | June 29 2011 |

How about "Up a Tall Tree: A Practical Guide To Understanding The California Ground Squirrel".

Submitted by NJDarlin | June 29 2011 |

My dog would like to read about: How to get more food out your bowl, How to get longer walks, How to train your owner to jog.

Submitted by Frances | June 29 2011 |

Brilliant idea - I am very tempted to start the magazine online, unless it already exists somewhere?

Submitted by Lisa | June 29 2011 |

How about. "The Cat IS the Enemy: 10 Ways To Intimidate That Fur Ball From The Other Room"

Submitted by N C Watts | June 30 2011 |

Cats must stop roaming free in neighborhoods that have robins, small birds...more than crows. Crows indicate a decline in habitat, I believe...not sure.

Submitted by clara gilbert | June 29 2011 |

The Man Whisperer by Daddy Milan The Secret Life of Rin Tin Tin

Submitted by Nash | June 30 2011 |

Well, I would find each and every book about food. Food food food food food food food food food and more food. When I run out of food books I will then focus on teats. I just cant get enough. And last I would find a book on how to open the frig when my peeps are not at home.

Submitted by Roz | July 1 2011 |

Butt Licking 101:

The delicacies, nuances and techniques that make this favorite past time even more enjoyable.

Preceded by: Butt Licking: How to do it without your owner freaking out!

What is the deal with our humans? If they'd only give it a try, they'd see that it's no big deal.

Signed, Basil - Dane of the House

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